INGRID E. SLEZAK, J.D.

 I N G R I D  S L E Z A K  F A M I L Y   M E D I A T I O N   S E R V I C E S

RECOMMENDED BOOKS ON DIVORCE

• Be a Great Divorced Dad, Kenneth N. Condrell, PhD (St Martin's Griffin 1999) A handbook that covers the practical and emotional issues facing divorced fathers today. Offers advice, guidance and support for the ever-growing number of divorced fathers who seek to remain "real" dads, but fear that their situation after divorce will make that impossible.

• Between Love & Hate: A Guide To Civilized Divorce, Lois Gold (Plenium Press, 1992) Filled with checklists and exercises, as well as case histories of couples who have found that mediation really works, Between Love & Hate empowers couples to negotiate, handle sensitive issues, and resolve conflicts in a way that allows them to emerge from divorce with their emotional well-being intact.

• Does Wednesday Mean Mom's House or Dad's? Marc J. Ackerman, Ph.D. (John Wiley & Sons, inc., 1997) In this wise and practical guide, Ackerman helps parents deal with the legal and emotional issues of child custody in divorce. He does not focus on "winning" custody battles but on finding the best arrangement for both parent and child. This book guides parents through coping with children's guilt, fear and feelings of abandonment, as well as practical issues such as custody disputes, relocation, remarriage, and long distance co-parenting.

• Every Other Weekend, Kenneth Parker and Van Jones (Thomas Nelson Publishers, Nashville 1993) Straight talk to divorced men who love their children but no longer live with them.

• The Good Divorce, Constance Ahrons, Ph.D. (Harper Perennial, 1994) Ahron's landmark longitudinal study of randomly selected post-divorce families offers hope that splitting spouses may be able to handle their breakup in a way that will permit both "adults and children [to] emerge at least as emotionally well as they were before the divorce." The Good Divorce offers advice and explanations to troubled couples for whom "staying together for the sake of the children" is not a healthy or viable option.

• Helping Your Kids Cope with Divorce the Sandcastles Way, M. Gary Newman, (Random House 1998) Neuman takes a hands-on approach and believes that children need not be permanently scarred by divorce—that with work and time, divorce can actually become a positive force for change. A powerful tool for protecting children caught amid parental struggles. The book is packed full of suggestions on everything from the best way to break the divorce news to a child to facing the holidays, visitation, custody arrangements, anger, discipline, co-parenting, single parenting, overcompensation, sorrow, custody fights and much more.

• Joint Custody With A Jerk: Raising a Child with an Uncooperative Ex, Julie A. Ross and Judy Corcoran (New York: St. Martin's Press, 1996) This hands-on, practical guide offers many proven communication techniques that will not only help readers deal with a difficult ex by describing examples of common problems, but also teach them how to examine their roles in theses sticky situation.

• Mom's House, Dad's House: Making Two Homes for Your Child, Isolina Ricci, Ph.D. (MacMillan and Co. 2000) This essential guide to life after divorce is a handbook for getting along and raising sane children in the wake of a divorce. Ricci offers specific techniques parents can use to establish a working, cooperative relationship with each other.

• Renegotiating Family Relationships, Divorce, Child Custody, And Mediation, Robert E. Emery (Guilford Press, 1994).

• Sharing The Children: How To Resolve Custody Problems And Get On With Your Life, Robert Adler (Bethesda, Maryland: Adler & Adler, 1988).

RECOMMENDED BOOKS ON MEDIATION

• The Divorce Mediation Answer Book, Carol A. Butler, Ph.D. and Delores D. Walker, M.S.W., JD (Kodansha International 1999) In this accessible question-and-answer guide, two experts address the many issues involved with mediated separation or divorce, from finding the mediator and dealing with emotions to discussing custody arrangements and figuring out financial terms.

• The Divorce Mediation Handbook: Everything You Need to Know, Paula James (Jossey-Bass Publishers 1997) "James, an expert in the field of divorce mediation, presents a clear view of what actually takes place in the mediation sessions and shows how couples can create a process that is non-adversarial and healthier for everyone involved."